Vanity Fair

Proof, as promised, that we made it to the highest peak on Friday.

A good friend sent me a list 35 questions to answer yesterday. She borrowed them from the back page of Vanity Fair magazine and was collecting answers from all her favorite people. Since it is a great privilege to be amongst her favorite people I, of course, happily complied. Here I share them, and my answers with you. Will you also answer?

1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Knowing that I’ve done my best, letting go of everything else.

2. What is your greatest fear?
Being abandoned or rejected by the people I love

3. Which living person do you most admire?
Kopalasingham Sritharan (aka Sri), human rights defender, colleague, inspiration and friend, read about him here

4. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
Envy

5. What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Cruelty

6. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
A sense of humour – wonderful in so many ways but it doesn’t make up for a lack of integrity or kindness

7. On what occasion do you lie?
When the truth is going to put someone in danger

8. What do you dislike most about your appearance?
How tired I look some days

9. What is your greatest regret?
I have very few regrets and none that are great

10. What or who is the greatest love of your life?
That is a really tough question. Maybe I’m still looking. In the meantime the thing that makes my heart smile, without fail, is to see children be given a chance to reach their potential

11. Which talent would you most like to have?
The ability to sing beautifully

12. What is your current state of mind?
Tipsy (my colleague just got back from India with gin!)

13. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
My tendency to cry in the middle of arguments

14. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Mentoring young Afghan men and women to promote human rights in their own country

15. If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?
A book of poems

16. What is your most treasured possession?
My iBook (and all that is stored in it) and/or my Canon EOS 400D

17. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Losing sight of my own basic goodness and the basic goodness of others

18. Where would you like to live?
If I could decide that then things might settle down a little bit…

19. What is your most marked characteristic?
Resilience? Compassion? Tenacity? Anal retentiveness? I’d like a second opinion.

20. Who are your favorite writers?
Mary Oliver, Rumi

21. Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
Pippi Longstockings

22. Who are your heroes in real life?
Sri (see no 3 above), Horia Mosadiq, Pema Chodron and Raji Sourani

23. What is it that you most dislike?
Cynicism and apathy

24. What is your motto?
“Be the change you want to see in the world”

25. Favorite Journey?
Walking along a sun-kissed beach with a good friend and the promise of a perfect glass of wine at the other end.

26. What do you value most in your friends?
The fact that they choose to be my friends despite everything

27. Which words or phrases do you must overuse?
“Quickly, please, I’m in a hurry”

28. Which historical figure do you most identify with?
Dame Whina Cooper (Did I say identify with? I guess I may have meant admire. Still, I aspire to identify with the Dame)

29. What is your greatest extravagance?
Air travel and Jo Malone products

30. If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
Nothing at all – they are perfect in their own maddening way

31. What is your favorite occupation?
Photography

32. What is the quality you most like in a woman?
Kindness

33. What is the quality you most like in a man?
Kindness

34. How would you like to die?
Unafraid

35. If you could chose what to come back as, what would it be?
A seabird

Here are some other answers:
Home in Kabul, soon to be Home in Herat
Rickshaw Diaries>
Thailand Gal

Comments

[Chani]

Very interesting questions! I think I'll run with it, too. :)

[Swirly]

I love this...you and have quite a few of the same answers. I think this will be my post tomorrow!! Missing you gorgeous.

[Lin]

mmm....and doing it being tipsy? :-)

remember to slow down these last few weeks.

thinking of you!

xx me

[homeinkabul]

So nice to see your picture!! I love seeing your face.

I think your most marked characteristic is being genuine.

I'm going to go work on my answers now. I'm such a copycat.

[Mandi]

Great questions, and even better answers -- thoughtful and lovely.

[Baraka]

Great photo & answers! :)

[boho girl]

i mean, you had me at "hello" but after reading that you want to come back as a book of poems and that Pippi Longstockings is your favorite hero of fiction i just fell even deeper in love with you. ; )

[Di]

I adore Hone Tuwhare's poetry and that particular poem brought tears to this kiwi's eyes as she read it. Thank you, I didn't know about it.

If you don't already have it, there's a lovely biography by Janet Hunt.
And I liked this: http://www.bookcouncil.org.nz/community/media/tuwhareposter.pdf

[susanna]

Great answers, Frida! I LOVE the idea of returning as a book of poems! What a wonderful idea... :)

[Mary]

With regard to point 6, and after our email conversation this morning, I completely agree with you (despite the fact that often I feel all that redeems me is my GSOH). There are times and places for boy's own adventures. Still fuming. Inspired to go back into the trade myself. Love you.
M

[Jeni]

Wow, your answers floored me. Each one brought out the same reaction in me - "amazing, I wish I would have thought of that!" Frida, you have such depth and consciousness...you are so admirable. (As I wrote that I realized it sounded trite, but it is not meant to be in any way. You really are a lovely, profound human being.)

[Katie]

I so enjoy the Proust questionaire...even if I don't buy the issue, I always flip to the back to read these! Lovely, thoughtful answers. Mary Oliver would be proud.

[maddie]

I would love to come back as a book of poems as well ~
and I sob in the middle of arguements ~ I rarely argue
because I am so unable to stand up for myself actually;)

Pippi~ !!! I adore Pippi ~ I love to dress up as
Pippi at Christmas ~ and I am off to read up
on Sri:)

hugs!

[schmoops]

i loved reading all these juicy tidbits about you,
i love that you wish to come back as a book of poems and
i love that you wrote this while under the influence of gin!
xoxo

[cath]

have i ever told you how fantastic you look in a headscarf? i love the more 'boho' photos of you too - when you're footloose and fancy free in other parts of the world... but you really have a face for the head wear...

[Kirsten Michelle]

i just love reading these little tidbits that really say so much...
you are just delicious...i will most definitely play along soon ;-)
love to you. xo

ps. gorgeous photo!

[leonie (chocolate covered musings)]

Well, i've been a lurker on your blog for a while, but I loved these questions (and your answers) so much I wanted to do my own answers. I've put them up on my blog today.

You are such an inspiration, your writing is so heartfelt and i love to visit.

Blessings,
Leonie

Oh, and...
- Are you a NZ'er or do your family just live there? I am NZ'er born and bred and love my homeland. though I'm living in London at the moment. Hope you have a great Christmas!
- Hone Tuwhare is one of my favourite NZ poets. Have you heard the Tuwhare album that a bunch of NZ musician's did? They put a whole bunch of his poems to music, I think it's really good! There was a James K Baxter one a few years back too.

[[a}]

..Pippi Longstockings rocks my socks!
Interesting how deep your answers are though you were tipsy.."book of poems"
^_^

Thanks for the link about 'Sri.' I've been wondering what was being done
about the violence in Sri Lanka that the newspapers are full of.

xoxo~

[Chookooloonks]

I love that you did this, and decided to play along:

http://chookooloonks.blogphotography.com/archives/7899_1714915339/271622

I hope you continue blogging when you return home. You have a beautiful site.